Lorri's Merge Roast

[Corey]

So, I wrote a rap. Its in the tune to I'm Real - Remix by JLO & Ja Rule. Hotness. Its called "I'm Newf" . And its lame as shit, but I fucking love it.

Here are the Lyrics :

What’s My Mother fucking name?

N E W F .

(Sippin’ back on the budlight, wonderin’ why Evans clothes are so tight)

And aint he got a family?

(Fuck please, the bitch wouldnt pay a hooker to drop to her knees)

Maybe Tucker would?

(Good call, the ladies over there look like they just came outta a bar brawl)

Now only Erik can judge me

(Only pissed, cause my head aint up yo ass, and boy you got dismissed, HOLLA)

I’ve met so many blondes
Its like there all the same
Attention seeking, Barbie wannabe
will be Alyssa’s only fame.

And when she starts to speak
I want to go fucking deaf
So trashy, and pathetic
She wouldn’t even get taken in by Heff.

Tired of the Model Toy? (Yeah Yeah)
Who the Fuck is RB RichBoy? (I don’t know)
Jason looks like he is 12 (yeah, yeah)
These people make me loose my mind (Oh Jesus)

Cause I’m Newf
(The way I Walk, the way I talk, Joey looks like Chewbac.)
Cause I’m Newf
(The way I don’t Care, Britt’s game sucks, loves my afro hair)
Cause I’m Newf
(Ching chang chong, oi wing wang, Jeffs asian love is wrong)
Cause I’m Newf
And I can’t wait to vote you out.

Alex, I was thinking about you’re retardedness
I thought you we’re joking but now I know you’re just a tit.
Quit the modelin’, head back to school,
then the world wouldn’t see yo ass as a fool.
Now Jeffrey with his Chinqy thing, probably fantasied about Cait-ling
But not known how about the growin to make rice, Yikes!
Fat and blonde people, asian and UK people
Bitches, I aint do this shit for nothin’.
Erik’s here to break hearts apart. And not even win
Boy the shit you lead alex on with is just a sin, hey
Evan’s nasty, ha, and a pedofile
But he still believes I actually fucking like him ha.


Cause Im Newf
(The way I Drink, The way I think, sorry jeff I aint a chink)
Cause Im Newf
(The way Im lame, The way if I don’t win this Im outta this game)
Cause I’m Newf
(I eat moose, nom nom moose, RB is a sorry excuse)
Cause I’m Newf

And I can’t wait to vote chew out

Now people can love me, or hate me, Brittany makes me sleepy
She lives for the skype and staying up late at night
Get a life and stop pretending to be Alex’s wifeee
Or you’ll end up like evan, Who’s internet girl is a guy named kevin.

Now people say whats the deal with you and Joey Jo.
Pfft, please that fugly bitch is a wannabe LO
Jason its time stop sucking your momma’s breast
All Favs crawl out of Eriks ass and play like the rest.

Tired of Alyssa’s IQ? (Yeah Yeah)
And Alex’s Fakeness too? (Yeah Yeah)
How about Tuckers Accent? (Yeah Yeah)

I’m actually not cause I love them..


Cause I’m Newf
(The way I walk, the way I talk, the way Joey looks like Spock)
Cause I’m Newf
(Britti straighten you’re hair, Evans the size of a bear, Alex came out as a ....)
Cause I’m Newf
(Go back to the UK, RB needs to get a lay, omgHAY GURL HAY)

AND I CANT WAIT TO VOTE YOU OUT.




OH SNAP, WANNA HEAR ME RAP?

I'm Newf

[thehooker]

<3